Photo Credit: worldofblackheroes.com
I am writing this from my husband’s bedside at the hospital. I really can’t say how many times we’ve been here within the past three years, but it’s enough that we now know nurses, doctors and technicians by name. This is not our first rodeo when it comes to battling “thorns”. We beat it by the Grace of Our Lord in 2009 and by faith, we will again.
When one partner is fighting “thorns,” the other becomes their Caregiver. No matter what the “thorns” are, you must continue to have each other’s back, no matter what. Caregivers are the decision makers when doctors need permission to perform any procedures or tests. Caregivers are also responsible for ensuring that all medications, diets and aftercare instructions are being followed properly. The duties of a Caregiver are endless and the job requires you to be present 24 hours a day, seven days a week. As a Caregiver, I find myself waking up in the middle of the night, praying over and covering my husband and children with the Blood of Jesus. I knew the mission wouldn’t be easy when I chose to accept it. But I have a Blessed Assurance by the name of Jesus Christ, the ultimate Caregiver, that through Him, all things are possible.
Caregivers are anyone who provides assistance and support to a family member or friend who has a physical, psychological or developmental need. Caregiving is practiced by parents who rear their young children, friends who care for a disabled neighbor, and adult children who bring their disabled parents to live with them. Mercy is a prime factor in caregiving – seeing the need of another and providing for that need. Caregiving requires the ability to love selflessly, not expecting anything in return.
Life’s lesson, marriage vows are deeper than we think. You know: “I take you… to be my wife (or husband). To have and to hold from this day forward for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, till death do us part, according to God’s holy law; and this is my solemn vow.” How many couples actually understand the magnitude of the marriage vows? After we have jumped the broom, did the electric slide or the wobble on the dancefloor and have ridden off into the sunset, do we truly understand that what we have vowed in front of God, Clergy, Family and Friends will be tested? The clock starts after the Clergy has introduced the couple to the congregation as Mr. and Mrs. “Joyful Bliss.” It has more symbolism than you can imagine.
I realize it now… standing here praying over my husband’s body from head to toe. Telling the devil, “not today! This appointment has been cancelled by the Holy Spirit. Our Archangels are in route to deliver our blessings. The Prince of Persia may have held it up, but reinforcements are here… In Jesus Name.” It hurts watching your Superman turn back into Clark Kent. You know “Superman is faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive and able to leap tall buildings in a single bound.” But all I can see right now is Clark Kent, the Reporter with his suit and nerdy glasses not being able to do anything, not even his job of reporting. And that makes me sad because I know if he could just get to that phone booth, he could change back into the Superman, Man of Steel that can and will defeat anything.
Sitting here as his Caregiver, helpless, not being able to perform my duties of providing the things he needs because it’s not within my power or control to do so. Only realizing that we made a vow together in front of God, Clergy, Family and Friends to be here for one another no matter what. And that is exactly what this Lois Lane is going to do.
So the next time you see “Lois and Clark”, in the words of Birdman, yes I said Birdman… “Put some RESPECK on it! And I ain’t gonna say it no more.”
Photo Credit: www.pinterest.com
“He is my SUPERMAN and I am his Lois Lane together we are perfect!”
The Chef and The Ref, as we are more affectionately called, are just two individuals who God joined together in the Spirit and then in the Natural to walk through the challenges of life together. We have been married for 27 years and have four amazing children. We get many calls, text and emails asking us questions about a variety of topics as it relates to marriage. This blog was inspired by the Holy Spirit and an answer to the growing demand of couples who inquire about our experiences in marriage as it relates to their own. We do not make any claims of being anything more than two sinners, saved by grace who wanted to give couples an opportunity to have safe conversations that will make their marriage stronger. The Chef and The Ref are both licensed and ordained Ministers in the Gospel of Jesus Christ who wanted to create a safe platform for married couples to converse about a variety of topics.