In my field, we use the acronym ED to mean Emotional Disturbance or Emotional Dysfunction of an individual. For an individual to be classified as having ED, they must exhibit one or more of the following characteristics which occurs over a long period of time and adversely affects their performance:
A. An inability to learn that cannot be explained by intellectual, sensory or health factors;
B. An inability to build or maintain satisfactory interpersonal relationships with peers;
C. Inappropriate types of behavior or feelings under normal circumstances;
D. A general pervasive mood of unhappiness or depression; or
E. A tendency to develop physical symptoms or fears associated with personal problems.
There is nothing new under the sun so we decided to do some further research regarding this topic in reference to the bible. There had to be someone or some circumstance biblically that could explain this condition that is ultimately destroying marriages. If the marriage bed is undefiled, then how did impotence, the lack of power, strength and helplessness wedge itself between a husband and his wife?
Let’s turn our attention to the gospel of St. John 5:1-14 where Jesus came to Jerusalem for a Jewish festival and He stopped by the Pool of Bethesda. The crowd at this pool were special in the sense that everyone there had some type of dysfunction. There were blind, lame and paralyzed people waiting by this pool. But this one man, who was impotent, had been there for thirty-eight years. When Jesus heard he had been there for a long time, he asked him, “Do you want to get well?”
Ok, let’s cut to the chase… Erectile Dysfunction has a Load of symptoms but a lot of it stems from a Dysfunction coming from the inside and you can even be safe to say, “From your Spiritual Man”. I wanted to know why these Dysfunctions happen because Society dictates that most Men will experience this one day. Whether from age, life circumstances, or even Genetics. But is that really true? So, I went to the main source and had a long conversation with God about this topic, considering that He is the Creator of all things... including bedroom business.
Believe it or not His answers were extremely precise and to the point. Since it was Never Gods Design for Man to Experience any type of Dysfunction, most Men in the Bible had lots of children. If you put two and two together, the only Dysfunction that occurred was over consumption of the Female anatomy…LOL… Needless to say, not even age played a part in their whole Bedroom Function. Nevertheless, man has always had a Fleshly desire to pursue wrong. Therefore God had to give Man Commandments so that even fighting desire, Man would have the necessary weapons to fight the wilds (thots) of the Devil (even in the Old Testament).
Now the Original Contract (The Ten Commandments; Exodus 20) tells us to Love God with all our hearts and the Last part of the Contract tells us not to Covet ANYTHING that belongs to our neighbor. Exodus 20: 17 KJV says, “Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's house, thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's wife, nor his manservant, nor his maidservant, nor his ox, nor his ass, nor any thing that is thy neighbour's.” So by Loving God we will trust who He puts in our lives as our Rib and will not lust after anything that our neighbors have, especially his Ass. Trust me, God knows the makeup of every Man and Woman and He knows what parts and Ribs that fit together. Grass is definitely not greener on the other side. Just because our neighbors ass looks like it could function better on our side of the fence does not mean that it will. As you know Asses are very stubborn and it takes a lot of coaxing to get it to do anything. But you don’t know what your neighbor had to do to get that Ass to function correctly. And guess what? When it gets to your yard it may not want to move at all or rise to the occasion to get the job done… NUTSHELL>> leave your neighbor and his asses alone…
Because sex sells everywhere we look, let us maintain some sort of Good Function and when we see that our Spiritual Man is beginning to show signs of Dysfunction run away by thinking on these things found in Philippians 4:8 – “ Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.”
The Chef and The Ref, as we are more affectionately called, are just two individuals who God joined together in the Spirit and then in the Natural to walk through the challenges of life together. We have been married for 27 years and have four amazing children. We get many calls, text and emails asking us questions about a variety of topics as it relates to marriage. This blog was inspired by the Holy Spirit and an answer to the growing demand of couples who inquire about our experiences in marriage as it relates to their own. We do not make any claims of being anything more than two sinners, saved by grace who wanted to give couples an opportunity to have safe conversations that will make their marriage stronger. The Chef and The Ref are both licensed and ordained Ministers in the Gospel of Jesus Christ who wanted to create a safe platform for married couples to converse about a variety of topics.